New Year, New Me?

January has that hopeful, slightly chaotic energy where anything feels possible—new planners are pristine, gym shoes are laced up, and even your houseplants seem ready for a fresh start (though for me there seems to be no saving them). Setting new goals is a bit like standing at the edge of a blank page with a new pen: exciting, intimidating, and full of potential. Whether you’re aiming to run a marathon, finally learn what quinoa is, or just stop replying “this year flew by” every December, goal-setting is our annual chance to dream big, laugh at ourselves a little, and decide who we want to become next—one hopeful resolution at a time. But how do we make sure that come December 31^st the only ball that has been dropped in in Time’s Square? That’s where our expert of the month comes in.

Krystal Shepard is the Outpatient Clinic Director at Champlain Valley Family Center. She has been working in the Substance Use Disorder field for over 20 years and is an advanced Credential Alcoholism and Substance Abuse Counselor with a gambling specialty designation. A clinician at heart, Krystal works with people on developing a variety goals and sticking to them every day.

Krystal, lets start from the top. What goes in to setting a good goal?

When thinking about setting a goal, it is important to first identify what change you want to see. Then try to make it as specific as possible. It is also important to identify why you want to set the goal. What is the desired outcome? Once you come up with a “why”, try to challenge that why 2 or 3 times, or as many times needed.

Can you share how this process would work in action?

Absolutely. I have worked with many individuals that set a goal of working on their mental health. That is a broad goal, so we need to try to identify what they want to see differently in their mental health. We need to be more specific.

Example:

Broad Goal: “I want to deal with things better.”

Specifics to target: What do you need to improve upon? Communication with others? Not avoiding situations or confrontation? Practicing different coping skills?

New Goal: “I want to share how things make me feel.”

Why? “So I can deal with things better.”

Why? “So I don’t feel as anxious.”

 

In this example, we only had to ask “why” twice before we got to the root of the goal – to reduce anxiety. Keep asking “why” until you have your greatest why.

What kinds of factors can derail even a good goal?

I think the easiest way to derail is expecting or  wanting to see immediate changes. Typically, when we set a goal, we have a vision of how things will look or feel different once that goal is achieved. Throughout the journey of accomplishing the goal, there can be ups and downs. I think it can be common to become discouraged if we are not seeing the progress we want or expected. Maybe we feel we’re not making progress or were thinking, “why can’t I do this yet?” These are common experiences. Being able to remember the ultimate reason you want to achieve the goal is important.

It is also important to set realistic goals. A good way to do this is by making them SMART. Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Timebound.

Can we have another example?

Sure!

If your goal is to be more active and you say you want to start running a mile every day without stopping, but you are currently unable to walk half a mile without stopping, it is not realistic to think that goal will be achieved.  Before even starting to work on our goal, we are set up to fail. So we need small goals that lead to the big goal.

Instead, let’s start with “I will exercise for 15 minutes 3 times a week for 2-3 weeks”. After those 2-3 weeks check in with your body and mindset and see if you can then increase the goal to exercising for 30 minutes 3 times a week and then gradually increase the number of days you exercise.

There are a few things that we did in that example. The SMART goal format is followed. We set small, specific, realistic goals that are attainable. The goal is measurable, did you do it or not? The goal is achievable. It keeps in mind what your current abilities are. The goal is relevant. The big goal is to run a mile without stopping, so by starting with walking we were working towards that goal. Lastly, the goal is timebound. We set the parameter of checking in every 2-3 weeks to see if the body feels ready to increase to the next increment.

Remember, you are worth investing time, energy and resources in yourself. Be kind to yourself. Sometimes we are our own biggest critics. Our internal voice can be quite critical. Try to talk to yourself as you would talk to a friend or coworker. If you wouldn’t say it to them, try not to say it to yourself.

That’s great advice, what else can we do to help stick to our plan?

It’s important to remember the “why” of the change you want to make. Being able to partner with someone that is trying to work on a similar goal can be helpful. Visual cues can also be helpful, like having a picture of something that reminds you of the goals you are working towards. Monitoring progress and rewarding yourself for reaching milestones is important. The ultimate motivator is usually progressing towards the ultimate goal.

Top 3 things to remember.

1. Set a clear goal and know your “why”.
2. Measure your progress regularly.
3. Any progress made is just that – celebrate successes.